A problem for many parents is their child's refusal to attend school. The child puts any excuse, said he was sick, and even goes to somatize that fear with severe stomach pains, vomiting, etc.. To really sick. Do you feel bad or is it an excuse not to go to school? What should parents do? How can solve this problem?
1. Why would you keep the baby?
It is important that parents know that this attitude is usually temporary, occurring mostly in children are very attached to their parents and those who find it hard to bond with others outside the family.
One reason appears when the child feels she can not move forward with standards of the school, the child before it is locked and the best way is to flee.
Overprotected children have difficulty separating from their parents even a few hours, these children can not do anything in the absence of their parents and have trouble relating to kids his age because their parents would not have passed the necessary resources to have self-confidence.
Some children have not learned to cope with the problems and difficulties with which you can find out, is a novelty for them, a heavy burden, and therefore try to avoid them.
Family problems affect children a lot, they feel responsible for parents' behavior and think that when they are away from home you something bad will happen to a parent.
2. What should parents do?
What should be done first, would discover the reasons why the child refuses to go to class. It is therefore recommended that parents talk with the child so he can express his feelings and learn to name the feeling of discomfort you are experiencing. It is well known to express feelings helps us feel better.
Would have to talk also with siblings, friends and teachers , as these can provide valuable information about comments and behaviors that the child manifested in different contexts.
When children find that their parents listen to and understand and feel a great relief may be time to initiate changes that the child needs. Although, at times, especially in the morning is advisable that parents do not pay attention to negative comments that the child can make about the school, and attend and reinforce any positive comment.
At first, until the child gets used a parent may accompany the child to school , and if necessary to the same class, this will give security to the child, until gradually get integrated with friends. This is a resource that can help ensure that your child starts the day right and do not feel the helplessness that sometimes feel this type of children.
It is good that parents believe their children are being deceived and are cunning, this makes the child feel desperate and even more in absolute solitude. So parents should listen and understand your child transmission .
When the child is very young and it takes time not attend class can begin gradually take , ie taking the child for a while in the morning or afternoon and go getting that will be gradually adapting to the new situation . As you go getting the adaptation should increase the time the child spends in school.
Often the problem is at home in the morning, take time to get up, eat breakfast and afternoon rush, do not dress, can not find the backpacks, parents are nervous because it affects his punctuality at work, etc. In these cases it is essential to establish a routine , it tries to get it all becomes a habit and is performed almost automatically. This helps not only to live the timeliness, but also that the child does not give you time to think and reflect on the school.
Parents should subtly interested in the activities each day in class , ask the children, reinforce and make it excite the events of the school . We can encourage children to invite classmates home, parents participate in activities organized by the school, etc..
In some cases, if the problem persists you should seek professional help , because otherwise the child may develop an intense fear of school. Although we have seen, that some of the children attending have had professional real reasons for refusing to attend school.